Perspective About Abortion is Important
If Life Choices is about nothing else, it is about perspective, and perspective about abortion is important. Women are caught in the crossfire of the currently overheated abortion wars. An epidemic of distorted legislation is spreading across the country in the form of bills that would give “personhood” to the fertilized egg in pregnancy, and more proposals that violate women’s bodily integrity by requiring ultrasounds for anyone requesting an abortion.
The patriarchy is alive and well and still living in America.
Forced motherhood has been the way of of patriarchy and dogmatic patriarchal religion for the millennia. It is the main way women have been subordinated to men throughout history.
Remember how it was not very long ago. Margaret Sanger and others who spent their lives ensuring the health and safety of women and children had to struggle hard. They were steadfast and courageous. Their work is not yet done.
Feminism, too, is alive and well, and growing.
If the women’s movement (around the world) stands for nothing else, it stands for the freedom of women to choose whether to have sex, whether to become pregnant, and whether to have a baby, or not. What I’m offering is a deep, earth-oriented perspective.
Women have been the arbiters of human life on earth as long as there have been humans.
Earth is where we live and what we are, and it is through our bodies, the body of Earth, that life renews itself.
Renewal comes through life dying into and giving birth to itself, which includes women’s choices to turn back some pregnancies.
Renewal and growth occur on all levels—physical, psychological, mental, and spiritual.
Human consciousness is by its nature a consciousness of choice because it is a consciousness of awareness and responsibility.
The intrinsic power of women to mediate between life and death is a defining aspect of Earth’s way of balancing life.
Abortion helps us learn both individually and collectively how to care consciously for the Earth and All Life.
Each of the above ideas is part of a holistic perspective about pregnancy choice making. I will share these concepts and more during the Life Choices west coast tour in March. I’ll be in San Francisco at Modern Times Bookstore, Ukiah for private meetings, Ashland at Bloomsbury Books, Portland at In Other Words, Seattle at Elliot Bay Book Company, and Bellingham at Village Books. Click here for more information.
West Coast Book Tour for Life Choices in March 2012
I’m about to embark on a book tour for Life Choices through several cities in California, Oregon, and Washington. The timing couldn’t be better. There doesn’t seem to be a day that doesn’t go by with news of some strange or dangerous attempt to roll back the reproductive health gains we have achieved in the last forty years. We need to explore what this is about and develop a deeper perspective about it all if we are to create the kind of society that treats women and men equally.
I’ll be talking about this and about other abortion related issues when I take Life Choices on the road. I will do what I can to spark discussion about the importance of the lessons we are learning from abortion and all the questions and feelings it stirs up. What makes the book unique is the integration of spiritual, psychological, historical, and political perspectives, and its orientation to caring for the earth. I’m excited to share this.
Here is the schedule:
Abortion Rights, Reality, Responsibility, and Respect
The core of reproduction as it effects women’s lives is what we pay attention to in the movement for women’s freedom. It’s not only about rights. It’s about reality, responsibility, and respect. Rights are not enough. We need more. Last week I attended a heartening celebration in Denver called Don’t Rewind Roe, hosted by Protect Families Protect Choice, which is a coalition of major women’s organizations in Colorado. We listened to an inter-generational panel of three accomplished women, each of whom spoke with deep intelligence and sophistication about the importance of safe, legal abortion. They reminded us how far we’ve come and how far we have to go. Each presenter was enthusiastic and knowledgeable. Each was calm and unapologetic.
The exchange centered in the lives of women from three designated generations–“pre-Roe,” “gen x,” and “millennial.” Each speaker offered her perspective about her own life, her family relationships, and her understanding of the impact of legal abortion. We were treated to film clips from the three eras, which augmented the dramatic changes that have taken place in the status of women. If you want to be reminded about how it was for women forty years ago–pre-feminist movement–take a look at those old movies and TV shows. As a pre-Roe woman I can tell you, it’s harrowing.
We have entered the fortieth year since Roe v Wade. Millions of women have been able to obtain safe, legal abortions when they needed them. Millions of lives were saved because women determined when and whether to carry a pregnancy to term. But we are under threat and the threat is increasing in volume and virulence. It’s looking like the rousingly hysterical anti-abortion rhetoric that has taken over the Republican party will dictate much what goes on in the presidential election.
Those who would make abortion illegal again have waged a relentless campaign to convince people that having a baby is always better than having an abortion, and that women have abortions because they don’t understand that it would be okay to have the baby. Neither of these is true of course. Women have abortions for all kinds of reasons, and underlying their decisions is a flashing light of clarity that having a baby with that particular pregnancy is not the right thing to do.
There is nothing wrong with having an abortion. There is no reason to feel bad about it or to qualify it in any way. It isn’t a “necessary choice” or a “sad choice” or an “unfortunate choice.” It is a good choice, as good a choice as continuing a pregnancy, just different. The defensiveness that some of us feel is a natural reaction to the nasty opposition that has been escalating in ferocity since Roe, but it is not helpful to women. At this point in the struggle it is crucial that everyone become absolutely clear that there is nothing to apologize for when it comes to abortion. That old idea that every abortion is a tragedy implies that there is something wrong with it, and there isn’t. This is one of the reasons I wrote Life Choices, to reclaim the legitimate place of abortion in life.
Lots has been happening with the book. I will be doing a WEST COAST TOUR in March, beginning in San Francisco, driving up to Ashland and Portland, and then to Seattle. This is being put together as we speak. Very exciting. Any and all help with contacts and connections is welcome. Please let me know if you can help, or if you want me to come to your area.
An essay I wrote was just published in the most recent issue of On The Issues magazine. It’s called A Counselor’s View: Embracing A Holistic Perspective of Abortion.
Last week I presented a webinar for the Abortion Care Network. I share their mission to de-stigmatize and normalize abortion.
More to come…
Blessings to you for all that you are and do.
Ten Ways to Stay Connected to Life
Doesn’t it bother you that people who hold an extremely narrow view of reproductive health have commandeered the word life? For example, bumper stickers that say Choose Life, are invariably anti-abortion. The pro-choice camp often responds with slogans like Protect Choice. There’s nothing wrong with that phrase, but it might not be the best response because it plays into the idea that somehow those of us for whom legal abortion is a blessing are not in favor of life. Nothing could be farther from the truth.
When women choose abortion they are choosing life as much as when they choose to continue a pregnancy. Both choices are life choices. Both choices are considered choices and involve deep reasoning and a lot of heart. The specifics of this is diverse and complicated. Each woman’s relationship to pregnancy involves myriad aspects of her life and life in general. Her ability to bring forth new life from her body encompasses her physiology and her psychology, and… her spirituality. Her judgment about the outcome of a pregnancy reflects an ancient and innate responsibility. We all know this, and yet we are faced with growing extremism in the name of life that denies what actually happens in real life. It’s a little wearying to say the least.
The best way to stay strong in the face of this is to stay consciously connected to All Life—the interconnected oneness of existence. This is important for both clarity about our work in the world and for our mental, physical, and spiritual wellbeing. I think it’s especially important this time of year when the stress of the holidays threatens to take over our lives.
Here are ten ways you can stay connected to life:
1. Meditate on a regular basis. (Sit in a quiet place with a straight spine. Breathe deeply and normally. Relax.)
2. Take walks.
3. Make contact with non-human nature—ground, sky, plants, rocks, animals.
4. Remember where you are—Earth.
5. Breathe consciously.
6. Make a list of everyone and everything you love.
7. Eat well and drink enough water.
8. Talk with your friends and stay connected with your community.
9. Remember that deeply rooted power relations don’t uproot easily. They change over the long haul and require the courage and persistence of the people seeking change.
10. Remember that the universe and all it manifests is vast. Trust the process.
Have a wonderful holiday season. Happy Solstice!
Life Choices Blog Tour—The Conversation
Our first Blog Tour for Life Choices came to an end today. A big THANK YOU to all the bloggers for their interest and support. Thanks also to Sentient Publications for bringing it all together. You can get to the blogs and their reviews/interviews by clicking on the LINKS in the SIDEBAR on the right side of this or any page of my site.
I am heartened by what most of these bloggers have to say about Life Choices. A good number of them are young and all of them are passionate about feminism and about reproductive freedom; they’re also extremely knowledgeable about the issues. They’ve given me a good feeling about the way blogs and bloggers work and the importance of this form of participation in the social conversation. After all, I’m new to the blog world.
There was one blogger whose review was mostly negative about both the book and me. I feel compelled to comment on some of what she said. I’ll start where she ends. She wrote, “Now is not the time to get in touch with our inner goddess. Now is the time to hurl bricks.”
I can’t imagine a worse idea. Hurl bricks? You could hurt someone, even someone you don’t mean to hurt. Plus, her remark (“inner goddess” being a term of her own making) implies that spirituality and politics are opposed to each other and that you have to choose one or the other. I don’t think that’s true, and it’s not helpful to set up false dichotomies in the interest of sounding militant. It just isn’t necessary. To call meditation or the ancient ceremony of the vision quest “new agey” is ridiculous on the face of it, but you can’t really know that unless you educate yourself about what they are. I invite that reviewer and anyone else to do that.
She also wrote that the stories in Life Choices about the women and their abortions “are touching, but out of place in an increasingly hostile political and social environment.” To me this shows a real lack of understanding with regard to the importance of women’s experiences with abortion. Out of place? Really? I don’t know about you, but the only social movement I want to be part of puts the stories of people in the center of its focus. History shows us that the most successful freedom movements are the ones that keep their eyes on the prize and don’t succumb to the tactics of the opposition.
Last week I had the pleasure of sharing speaking time with a pastor from the Colorado chapter of RCRC (Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice). We were each asked to speak about spiritual issues and abortion at a Women’s Health staff meeting. It was an honor as well as a pleasure to be in such good company.
This is all to be continued of course. The conversation is important and will go on for a long time. We all have to hang in there, take care of ourselves, and stay clear about how we want to move in the world. I’m grateful to anyone who expresses their thoughts about what’s in Life Choices. I’m grateful for it all.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Life Choices: The Teachings of Abortion-Talking About the Book
Life Choices is taking me on quite a journey. Ideas I’ve been living with for most of my life are now out there in the world making their way into the wider conversation. It’s exciting and gratifying to say the least.
My talk and signing in Denver at the Tattered Cover bookstore went well. What an honor to have been invited to that famous place! I loved the conversation with the people who came. Someone asked me about the “pinching of the leaves to let the mother plant grow,” which is the defining statement of Life Choices and was the impetus for me to write the book in the first place. Someone else asked about how spiritual healing happens around abortion experiences. Another person asked me to discuss the connection between nature and consciousness, in other words, why it’s important to spend time in the woods! Finally, another big piece was a question about how to stop the meanest most violent attacks against women’s health services and needs. We talked about all these and more. Heady stuff I know, but it’s all good.
I’ll start with the last one first. The main way I know to deal with the virulence of the movement against women’s health needs is to remain active, educated and strong ourselves and never forget how complicated and deep the issues are. Reproductive and sexual freedom goes against the power of patriarchy. The whole idea of women’s freedom is new from a historical point of view. The idea that a woman is an individual apart from her relationship with a man or men is still completely unacceptable in many parts of the world. Narrow religious views that limit the freedom of individuals are still dominant in certain circles. I think it’s best to cultivate compassion in relation to the ignorance and fear that drives the thinking of many anti-choice people. Because the politics is absurd and baffling as well as dangerous and infuriating, we have to remember what is true and real about women’s lives. In other words, stay true to real life. Lastly, each of us has to take good care of ourselves.
Moving on to nature and consciousness. A huge subject. The person who asked the question was asking me to explain the value of spending time alone in wild nature; basically, what happens out there? I responded that when you set an intention to spend time in the company of more-than-human nature and to be outnumbered by non-human life forms—animals, plants, and other earth bodies—you will find as you open to their way of being and relax yours, that there is a flow of life force through everything and a natural communication that mirrors your essence and helps you to know yourself better and understand what you are doing here on the planet. There is much more I could say of course, but that’s it in a nutshell. If you are grappling with an unresolved issue in your life such as a crisis pregnancy, you will find a level of support there that you can’t find anywhere else.
My approach to spiritual healing after an abortion depends on the person seeking the healing. If someone has a religious affiliation, I encourage her to go talk with someone in her group. If that is not possible, or even if it is, I proceed in counseling by asking a lot of questions to help the person explore her belief system and conflicts she might be experiencing about having decided to have an abortion. For anyone, whether she has a religious affiliation or is independent of religion, or someone who is just beginning to ask questions about spirituality, I suggest practices like meditation, journal writing, and time in natural settings because these support the process of self-clarification.
And lastly, about pinching the leaves. The phrase still takes my breath away because it captures the essence of creativity and self-creation—the dying into the living that is the essence of life on Earth. Abortion both as a social issue and a personal experience is a teacher about this fundamental way of things. The stories of women tell it all. There are many in the book.
MORE NEWS: I am thrilled with the way my FIRST BLOG INTERVIEW came out. Huge thanks to writer Carol Turner for her very thoughtful questions. Stay tuned for a full blown BLOG TOUR coming soon.
Abortion Healing, Feminism, and the Earth
I’ve heard from a good number of women and men since Life Choices came out in September. Sometimes it’s about their own abortion healing, and sometimes it’s about their desire for more depth, clarity, and kindness in the public dialogue about abortion. Everyone I speak with expresses alarm and sometimes disgust about the current political battles around abortion.
It’s all I can do not to be upended by the severe antipathy of the political debate.There is an urgent need for us to once again fervently and courageously hold our ground. The big lesson is about trusting our own voices. It’s about not being manipulated by people, especially people in power, who claim to have our best interests at heart but who really don’t care at all about our lives. Our real lives I mean, and the real life of our planet.
The attack being waged against women is nasty and ferocious, and led by narrow thinking, usually ignorant, mostly male legislators trying to turn back the most basic of services that provide safety and good health to women. And how are they doing it? By hollering about abortion, as if abortion were the worst thing in the world. By speaking of abortion as a life taker when it is really a life giver. By lying about the real lives of women and men. By playing on the fear and embarrassment most people feel about anything related to sex. And worst of all, by pretending they care about women, which they do not, because if they did, they would know not to wipe out services that are essential to the well being of women and their families.
The current situation can make you a feminist in an instant. There’s no getting around it. In April, Terry Tempest Williams (one of my favorite authors), felt called to write about the furious attack on our health options.
What is good for women is good for humanity. The world’s population is rising as the earth’s resources are being depleted. This is the conversation we need to engage. Tending to women’s reproductive health is tending to the health of the planet.
I was on the radio the other day being interviewed about abortion healing and the ideas in Life Choices. The wonderful people at KGNU, our local community radio station, were passionate, intelligent, committed, and supportive. I’m grateful.
I’ll do a book talk and signing at the Tattered Cover (Colfax Store) in Denver on Friday, November 4, 7:30 p.m.
What a time this is to be re-entering the fray!
A Special Thank You
Today is the birthday of my dear friend and spiritual teacher, David LaChapelle (Oct. 8, 1952-July 21, 2009). David served the world through deep heart teachings and an extraordinary ability to perceive psychological, spiritual, and scientific—especially ecological—phenomena, often simultaneously. The result was an intriguing mix of usually separated truths joined with a poetic sensibility when he spoke or wrote. He linked everything, whether it was the most exquisitely personal piece of daily life or a grand scientific theory. He pointed the way forward to a more unified way of living on the earth.
David saw through a lens of layered perception and a direct intuitive line to the All. He mirrored those of us who knew him with an accuracy that allowed us to melt into ourselves and surrender to our soul’s mission. He did it all with an unremitting love of each individual’s essence and the essence of the world.
In Navigating the Tides of Change David wrote about how “accelerated change is pushing us to a new understanding of our role upon the planet.” Much of this understanding is about learning to care for the planet and for ourselves with our hearts open. In my book, Life Choices, I bring some of what I learned with David to issues that are intimately female but that effect everyone. I thank him for the support and love he gave to help me to go my own way and pursue the rightness of my path. Happy Birthday, David!
On another note, I am touched by the many emails and other words of support that are coming in for Life Choices. Here are some upcoming events:
I’ll be interviewed on Boulder’s KGNU radio station – Friday, October 21, 8:30-9:30 a.m.
I will sell books at a benefit show for Boulder Valley Women’s Health Center – Saturday, October 22, 8 p.m. at Boulder Theater.
I’ll be at Tattered Cover (Colfax store) for a book talk and signing on FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 4, 7:30 p.m. Please join me!
Please make a comment below if you feel so moved. I would love to hear from you.
Life Choices Empowers Women
Life Choices: The Teachings of Abortion is now widely available. I had my debut talk and signing at Boulder Bookstore on Tuesday to a packed room of current and new friends (around 60! I was told). There was a lot of heart and a lot of love in the room, as well as a depth of thought and consideration about the need to thoroughly examine the ways in which we can engage with the abortion issue to improve women’s lives. What an auspicious start to the unfolding of this book’s path!
Several people spoke to issues of power and empowerment in women’s lives. That empowerment comes as we open to making conscious choices about caring in our lives—who and what we care about and where and when we do the caring. As more and more people move in that direction, through confronting the necessities of their lives (including making choices about pregnancy), we will develop the skills to make the same kinds of choices in relation to the whole earth. Moreover, we will become clear that we and the earth are one and the same and that what we do to her we do to ourselves. We can be inspired by the courage with which women face their lives, and embrace all of life’s difficulties as we protect and preserve the only home we have—our body and the body of the earth.
Boulder Valley Women’s Health Center will have a “funraiser” on October 22 at Boulder Theater. I’ll be selling my book there.
I’ll be at Tattered Cover (Colfax store) for a talk and signing on Friday, November 4, 7:30 p.m. I’m looking forward to it very much. Please join me, and tell all your friends.
Pro-Choice is Pro-Life as Far as the Earth is Concerned
Pro-choice is pro-life as far as the Earth is concerned. My new book, Life Choices: The Teachings of Abortion, synthesizes this understanding. I’m excited to be able to offer it to you. I want so much for us to move beyond the violence of the fierce and consuming struggle to keep abortion safe and legal. A spiritual ecology of relationship, connection, and love—of heart—along with a clear feminist vision can help this along. My hope is make a contribution to this through the ideas in Life Choices.
The book has been a long time coming – over twenty years. It took all that time because the deepening of my experience of connection to the All of Life had to reach a point of solid knowing that my own nature as a human being and as a woman was part of nature, not separate from it, and where I had direct experience of the oneness that unites all of life. As my life unfolded, the strength and inclusivity of my growing perspective allowed me to delve into some of the more difficult aspects of the abortion issue. Nature’s ongoing creativity is a life-death-life “choice making.” It is from this point of view that I see the life giving aspect of the abortion choice and say that pro-choice is pro-life.
Life Choices is now available for pre-order by clicking on one of the icons in the column on the right. It will be in the bookstores by late September. I will give a talk and book signing at Boulder Bookstore on Tuesday, September 27, 7:30 p.m. It’s an exciting time.